Saturday, May 29, 2010

None of these things have anything in common with each other:

1. So everyone's putting on facebook that Dennis Hopper died, but not knowing who on earth he was meant that I had to do a google image search. I found a few pics of Dennis Hopper (still don't recognize him), but this is what caught my eye . . . a picture titled "Paul Newman by Dennis Hopper, 1964." No idea if the photographer is the same Dennis Hopper, but it's one of the HOTTEST, most gorgeous photos I've ever freakin' seen:

seriously! can't stop staring!

2. After having now seen Sex and the City 2 twice, I still haven't conclusively decided on a favorite outfit (Carrie's cream/blue accented, long, flowy nightgown? Miranda's dress at Stanford's wedding? The gray, rope-waisted, mid-calf dress Carrie wore on the airplane to Abu Dhabi? The light pink billowy one shoulder dress with sequined turban? Carrie's Dior ensemble when she sees Aiden at the spice market?). The only thing I can say definitively was that my favorite thing worn in the movie were Carrie's gold glitter Louboutins from the opening scene. What was your favorite? Although it's always fun to look at SATC fashion, I'll admit that I was more stunned by the outfits in the first movie.

3. This morning I'm lazily drinking coffee and grading finals at my kitchen's bistro table when I get to ZT's final (some of you may remember ZT from here or here or here). Here are two (of many hilarious) answers to questions on his final exam:



I don't know how to rotate them, so you'll have to click on them to really see. The question in the first picture says: "In your opinion, what are some of the problems with the prison system in the U.S.? Use examples from things we've discussed in class." I was looking for answers such as: high recidivism rates, disproportionate incarceration of people of color, over 200 people exonerated from Death Row in the past 30 years, racial segregation and violence, and/or billions of dollars spent on the prison system that could be going to education, etc. Instead, I got ZT's answer. Notice how he switched up each "gang rape" with inverted/upside down letters, symbols, etc.

In the second picture, the question states the Miranda Rights as they currently are, and then asks the students to, considering what they've learned about arrest and incarceration, rewrite the Miranda warning to best protect the rights of arrested people. ZT's response:

You have the right to shut the fuck up. Any fucking thing you say will be used in court. You have the right to speak to a cracker. You will get a cracker if you can't afford one.

What do y'all think I should give him on his final? ;) Happy weekend!

Thursday, May 27, 2010

It's a Good Thing Leos ♥ Geminis


cause my family's full of them! Happy birthday to three of my favorite Geminis:

My Mama (turned 49 on May 24th)

mama (on the right) with one of her best friends, Nelah


mama and stepdaddy


My Grandma (May 27th--she is 90 today!)

G$ x 3

Those amazing pictures of my grandma were taken by my ridiculously talented brother-in-law, Andy Lee. Andy's photos do proper justice to all the wonder, love, and strength that is my grandma . . . a woman who served in World War II, who has triumphed over breast cancer, several heart attacks, and a stroke, and who is one of the funniest (and snarkiest) people I know. I can't wait till my sister's 90 because she's gonna be just like Grandma. Wait a minute . . . at 25, she pretty much already is. ;)

My Daddy (turns 56 tomorrow, May 28th)

me, daddy, sister in Cabo

me and my daddy at my sister's wedding rehearsal

Happy Birthday to my dear, dear family. Can't wait to celebrate with all of you when I'm home in Georgia in just nine days!!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Mum's the Word

You know that expression originated with Shakespeare? I guess that's not actually even remotely surprising. It's supposed to refer to the sound that comes out when you try to speak with closed lips (mmmmmm). I hate to admit it, but I kind of love etymology.

So why mum's the word? Cause I saw Sex and the City 2 last night. Oh my goodness gracious alive, it was good! I won't say anything revealing . . . just that not even the nightgowns disappoint. Be ready for some serious glamour. Especially the gold glitter Louboutins in the opening scene (my heart dropped a little when I saw them). Without spoiling anything, here are some things you can look forward to:

*some magnificent gowns, shoes, accessories, and nightgowns (seriously, the nightgowns: whoa!)
*a few amazing and hilarious cameos
*some hottttttness
*SJP's stunning, wavy, slightly darker hair
*2.5 hours of Carrie & co!

Here's the camp ground outside the theater for those of us with advance screening tickets (even with ticket in hand, I got there an hour and a half early):

I went with five girlfriends and we had such a great time . . . anticipating it, quivering with excitement at the opening credits, gasping in awe throughout the movie, and squealing happily afterwards. Get ready, girls! You're in for some fun.


XOXO!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Farmers' Market Sunday

What a lovely weekend it's been! On Friday night I got to hang out with four of my favorite people, the Freitags--Cari and I talked about girly stuff and American Idol and hot actors while JJ cooked us a delicious dinner; how awesome is that? Saturday, after a loooooong and exhausting week, I literally slept most of the day, which is kind of ridiculous/incredible, but I think my body was demanding it. Later that night, eight of us congregated in North Beach for dinner & drinks to celebrate our friend Mike's birthday (happy birthday Mike Lee!). I wore my go-to little gray dress & patent leather peep toes, and it was so nice to get dressy and pretty after a lazy day in my bed.

Meagan and I took the train home, which meant that I was home at a reasonable hour (last train is at 12:15). After a delicious night of sleep, I woke up this morning and headed to my neighborhood farmers' market, which is one of my favorite places on earth. Check out my loot!

1. I almost always buy the same things, every week!

2. fava beans

3. does it make me a stalker if I snuck a pic of my Afghan food stand crush?

4. I actually feel sorry for people who don't live near Blue Bottle Coffee

5. just PART of the line for Blue Bottle . . . the coffee really is that good

6. my farmers' market breakfast: strong coffee, apple turnover, organic cherries

1. Can you believe all that business? I've never seen prettier swiss chard (which I eat a lot of), organic broccoli and carrots, fresh spring salad mix with edible flowers, fava beans, best coffee in the world, and my favorite . . . organic, fresh, homemade pasta. Seriously, the best pasta I've had in my entire life. In the past, I've had meyer lemon chili (spicy and so delish!) and meyer lemon linguini, but today I opted for the black pepper rosemary linguini. Usually, I do this:

Crazy Good Veggie Pasta
*In a wok, saute two heads of swiss chard, broccoli (or even better: broccolini), thinly sliced onions, garlic, red pepper, and carrot shavings in olive oil
*(I add the onions first, then garlic, and once the onions are semi-transparent, add everything else)
*Add chili flakes, s&p, maybe some oregano
*while this is cooking, flash cook the fresh pasta in boiling water (it literally takes 60 seconds)
*drain pasta
*add pasta to the wok, mix everything together, shave feta cheese & mix it in

OMG. Seriously.

2. One of the things JJ made us on Friday night was fava beans. I can't remember exactly how he did it, but I think it was along the lines of: toss in olive oil, s&p, maybe a little garlic and lemon??, then cook on high (450) until brown on top. SO GOOD.

3. My crush on this dude is long-standing. Isn't he a hottie? I've been seeing him at the farmer's market for over a year, but there are always pesky customers wanting samples from him, so it's hard to get a word in. I don't even know his name, but I do know that he's fiiiiiiiine! Of course, snapping a picture of him on the low is probably not the smoothest thing in the world.

4. This coffee is locally roasted and organic and really just SO good. It's expensive--a half pound runs anywhere from $7 at the cheapest up to about $40 . . . for a half pound! Although I've never made the crazy splurge, I buy the $7-$8 half pounds just about weekly, and they're worth every penny (and all the minutes waiting in that epic line!).

How was your weekend??

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Notes from Cloud 9

You won't believe what happened tonight.

After work today, my friend Meagan and I went to a happy hour Sex and the City 2 promotion party at a club called Harlot in San Francisco. You know you're in for a good time when you walk in the door and are handed a raffle ticket and a cupcake. ;) Not even the pricey cosmos could keep us down! The party was thrown by a local radio station, and they were raffling off tickets to an early showing of Sex and the City 2 (this coming Monday night!), a spa package, a $500 gift certificate to Tiffany's, a pair of Manolo Blahniks, and a pair of Jimmy Choos.

This pic is almost too bad to post, but it's all I got:

yes, I'm shorter than Meagan even when I'm in heels and she's not

So we head to the bar and order up a pair of cosmopolitans, then find a seat at a swank table in the middle of things. The djs are snapping pictures, Meagan and I are chatting, people are mingling. Before we know it, boom! My name is called--2 tix to an advance screening of the movie! Then, boom! Meagan's name is called, 2 more tix! An hour later, we're heading out the door, figuring that since we've already won tickets, we can't win the big swag. But lo and behold . . .

"And the winner of the $500 gift certificate to Tiffany's . . . Claire Kiefer!!!"

Unreal! So I giddy-up to the front and claim my prize, only to be followed by the dude who won the Jimmy Choos (what?? a dude??). Immediately, a lightbulb! I chased him down and with one quick "excuse me, sir" had negotiated a fine, fine trade . . . and he left happily with the Tiffany gift certificate while I left with these perfectly-sized beauties in my paws:


OMG.

I'll get back to you on Monday about the movie . . . sans spoilers, of course!!

Blog Name

I changed my blog name to match my url. It's easier that way, I think. And shorter. I like it better now . . . I think Bicoastally better encompasses having my heart stretched between Georgia and California, and all that comes with it. Plus, one word is better than six. ;) Hope it's not too confusing!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I have a confession to make


. . . I really, really love Lynyrd Skynyrd.

I abhor the Confederate flag, would rather be in a room with 25 convicted felons than 25 die-hard Skynyrd fans (though it's quite possible there'd be some overlap), and adore Neil Young just as much as I do Lynyrd Skynyrd. I've even had the harrowing experience of a Skynyrd concert, where most attendees were Bud-guzzling, mulleted men draped in oversized Dixie flags. Nevertheless, I can't help it . . . maybe it's my Georgia upbringing, maybe it's the appreciation for southern rock instilled in me by my parents . . . but I think these good ol' southern boys are genius:


And DAMN did Lee Dewyze do Skynyrd some justice last night on American Idol! When he announced that his personal song choice was "Simple Man," my respect for Lee soared. Who would have thought a mainstream-ish midwesterner would be so awesome as to choose one of the greatest songs ever? As soon as he started talking about it, I knew I was gonna love it. And he was brilliant. Convicted, honest, and pure . . . it was amazing. Even if you don't watch Idol, go to youtube pronto and look up Lee's renditions of both Simple Man and Hallelujah (Simon's choice for Lee).

Speaking of which. When Simon chose Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah for Lee to sing, I was like awww man! for real?? I mean it's probably the most covered song in the world (watch out--Miley Cyrus might be next), and we've already heard the dang song this very season (though Tim's version was forgettable). But I guess the smack-talkin' Brit knows what's up, cause Lee ROCKED IT OUT. Seriously, I got the chills. And then immediately watched it again. The choir and the horns helped make the performance killer, no doubt, but Lee himself was on his A-game. INCREDIBLE!

I'm a total convert now. (Though I haven't gotten over my love for Andrew Garcia).

Other things I'm excited about this week:

*My amazing package to Micaela (I'm pretty proud of myself for this one)
*Cosmos, Cupcakes, and Couture (Ummmm OMG! SATC 2 party this Thursday night--with passes for the premiere, $500 to Tiffany's, and Jimmy Choos up for grabs!)

(I kinda want this for my living room)

*the Grey's Anatomy season finale (I'm a little embarrassed that 1/2 of my excitement this week is about tv)

We're halfway through the week! Hope yours has been a good one so far. :)

Monday, May 17, 2010

Goin' Postal

So I'm notoriously bad about mailing things, even though I really love mail and packages and assembling things to send to people. However, I've been re-inspired, and have since turned my living room into a craft factory. I've gotten really into making my own cards . . . some good letters and packages are coming your way, people! No pics so as not to ruin the surprise. :)

Or perhaps I'm just emulating the chaos of the post office because things are so freakin' crazy in my life . . . for instance: one day off in 19 days! Yikes. Way too much work, folks. Also, my new roommate announced last night that her job, too, is coming to an end, and so she's moving back up to Humboldt County July 1. Man oh man oh man . . . and since I've pretty much decided that I'm not ready for co-habitation, this means I gotta start the grueling roommate search yet again. Or just crawl under my blankets and pretend it isn't happening. Or moonlight as a phone sex operator so that I can afford the whole rent by myself and not have to get a roommate. What do y'all think?

All this frenzy and exhaustion and stress just makes me miss Georgia and want to be home visiting my family. Soon, though! I fly into Atlanta June 5 and get to stay till the 14th! (My grandma, G$, is turning 90 . . . that's OLD, y'all. Feel free to send her scotch--it's her favorite thing in the world). These are some of the things I'm looking forward to in Georgia:

me, stepmama, mama, sissy

daddy

sweet tea

the Brick Store in Decatur--my favorite place to sit with my sis over a long lunch

the worst dog in the world: Ignatius R. Kiefer

Until then, I'm off to brave the relentless rain and make my maimed boy some cookies. Hope Monday's been kind!


Friday, May 14, 2010

Obsessions

Those of y'all who actually know me know that I'm obsessed with two Hollywood ladies.

One because she's adorable:



Seriously, what I'd give to have a kid that cute one day. I can't get enough of her. She's the prettiest little thing around, and she has an enviable wardrobe at 4 years old (yes, y'all . . . Suri turned 4 in April. Doesn't time fly)?

And one because she's grotesque:



I'm really sort of obsessed with the Cat Woman, Jocelyn Wildenstein. (Click on Cat Woman for Mayra's post that inspired me to post an homage to The Lion Queen). For a while, I was reading all up on her and poring over her life and making everyone I know look at pictures of her. She's so fascinating . . . in a terribly tragic sort of way. Did you know that she's reportedly spent 4 MILLION DOLLARS on plastic surgery? And that she asked her surgeon to make her look feline to play to her then-husband's tastes? Man oh man. I am so fixated on her that I even wrote a poem about her for my Wednesday night Cobras poetry/dinner/wine group:

Jocelyn

Bride of Wildenstein, your gaze

interrupts the sun—eyes drawn up to nowhere

some unimaginable constellation


Hercules strangled him because

Leo’s hide was unpuncturable by stone,

if you tried to think of a million ways to die—


Everything is some shade of yellow. Every day

is Tuesday. There’s a sweet synchronicity

to the way 7 o’clock exhales in surrender:


Okay, it’s over, you can rest. Lie down, sleep,

it’s all right if you die a little bit. Your skin

is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen.


The Eiffel Tower is slowly crumbling.

I swear I heard this dragonfly talking—shrillest

pitch—said her face is aglow with


radioactive heat. Please believe me—

I saw you at a café with your son. He looks at you

with a tender fear, jaundiced


in your shadow. Butterflies abuzz

swarm your head in awe. This is our landing patch.

This is our blonde mausoleum. This is


the most beautiful tragedy


That's my unedited ode to Jocelyn . . . maybe I'll have to write a whole series about her. I kind of love her. And fear her. Mostly, though, I fear her.

Happy Friday! I'm off to 21st Amendment and then to the Giants' game with my peeps--yay weekend!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

5th Period Conversation Today

Scene: When I began writing the initial journal question on the board in room 102 today, an incredibly foul smell began to permeate the room. It immediately became clear that one of them had set off a stink bomb in my classroom. Did you know those actually exist? If not, consider yourself lucky. It's the foulest thing I've ever smelled in my life.

So we move outside to have class in the quad. Because several of my little darlings have severe ADHD, this was problematic, as there were people and classes walking by regularly.

ZT: Ms. Kiefer is one of those white girls who wants to be black. She probably listens to hella Keyshia Cole and wishes she was black.

GM: No I think Ms. Kiefer just hella cares about black people!

ZT: Ms. Kiefer, what kind of guys do you like? Do you crave black men?

***

I'm serious, y'all. This convo took place, verbatim, 10 minutes ago. God help me. I should also mention that I found ZT wandering the halls (stalking my office) this morning when he should have been in 4th period, so I personally escorted him up to Mr. Porter's room. All the way up there, he shouted through the hallways (and into classrooms): "BLACK PEOPLE DISTURB THE HALLWAYS!"

And in case there was any confusion, ZT is black.

XOXO, happy mid-week!

Monday, May 10, 2010

I'm the proudest mama hen you'll ever meet

Three things about my students' performance on Friday night:


1. Pictures







2. Videos
(these videos are each less than 30 seconds long, but I think they communicate just how powerful this whole experience was)


video


video


video




3. An Article
(that the amazing Laura Moore wrote for the SF Examiner about my kiddos--check it out here! She's so kind! And if you click on "subscribe," she gets paid more money). :)


Okay, done bragging on my little monsters!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mama's Day at the Aquarium

I know I yammer on about my students way too much (probably more than you wanna hear about), so I'm gonna take a break from that and post about Mother's Day today, and then tomorrow I'll let y'all know how INCREDIBLE the ROOTS students were at our performance Friday night. OMG, they made me prouder than I could have imagined. But more on that tomorrow.

Today, after calling my little mama (who lives alllllll the way across the country in Georgia), I met Jeannette and Freeman at the California Academy of Sciences in Golden Gate Park. I hadn't been there yet, though Freeman is a frequent visitor. It's pretty amazing! Here are some pics:

Jeannette and Freeman on Mama's Day

"Diver Brian" feeding the fish

Freeman watching the "fissssssshhhh"

Jeannette left to have a fancy Mother's Day lunch with Jon, and I took Freeman for the afternoon. (While in my car driving home, F was asking for "More Gaga" before her song was even over--geez).

Though hanging out with Freeman is the next best thing, I wish I could be with my mama and our family today. When I talked to her, she was just arriving at my aunt's house with her mud pie (my mama makes the most ridiculously good mud pie you can imagine!). All my aunts, uncles, cousins, sister, nephew, and our Nana were gathering together today . . . holidays make me the most homesick. I wish I could just transport myself to Georgia for the day and then back to California for work tomorrow morning.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms, especially my cute mama:



Friday, May 7, 2010

Night and Day

It's such a trip teaching wild teenagers who've had people in their lives locked up--many of whom have learning and/or emotional disabilities, anger issues, serious ADHD, bad impulse control, etc., who often don't have stable housing, healthy food, or any sort of consistency in their lives . . and then babysitting after school for little infants and toddlers who are the healthiest, most loved, well-cared for kids on the planet. Guess it speaks to the greater chasm in our society between the lucky and the unlucky, those who have and those who don't. Gotta say, I'm pretty glad that I have both in my life. Here they are, my little paradoxes:





My cousin Adam was in town early this week for business (ohhhhh how I wish I was "in town" in cool cities "for business," hahaha). He was staying around Fisherman's Wharf, and my friend Josh Klipp happened to be performing a jazz set nearby at Enrico's in North Beach, so I swung by and picked up Adam on Tuesday night, and we sat at Enrico's, semi-outdoors, and listened to Josh croon while eating yummy Italian food and sipping cocktails (well, *I* was sipping cocktails). Josh is a great singer, dancer, and def knows how to work a stage! Check out his sometimes jazzy, sometimes R&B-ish music. Did I mention he's a lawyer by day? I love seeing my talented friends perform. And, I love seeing my talented STUDENTS perform. Which they're doing tonight, at CIIS in San Francisco, at 6:30 pm! They really are so brave, getting on stage and reading their stories about the saddest parts of their lives. I'm kind of in awe of them right now (wait--maybe I should save that for tomorrow--don't wanna jinx it).

Here's a photo of Josh at Enrico's that doesn't do him or the place justice:


So excited for the weekend, y'all! After my kiddos' big event tonight, I plan to do a whole lotta nail-painting, tv-watching, sun-basking, day-dozing, lazing about tomorrow!

Wish my little rascals luck tonight!

Also:
1. Check out Summer's delicious giveaway (sweet yellow handmade rose earrings? what's more perfect for this time of year??)!

2. Then, check out sweet Micaela's delicious giveaway (J.Crew necklace & floral pouch!)--soooo pretty! Plus, her blog is one of my faves and she's my new favorite email friend.

XOXO

Monday, May 3, 2010

Making me happy

I've been siiiiiiiiick these past few days--like "chicken" (fake chicken since I'm a vegetarian) noodle soup/ice cream/sudafed/cough drop/bubble bath sick--and a super long day at work today didn't make things any better. However, there are four things that are tickling my fancy right now and making everything much, much better! In no particular order:


My cds arrived from my lovely cd exchange partner, Char, today! She decorated this adorable package and mailed it all the way from the U.K., and what a delight to receive new music on an otherwise not-so-great (i.e. SICKLY) day. I listened to one of them on my drive home from work today, and so far I love it! Thanks, Char!


OMG! Thanks for this one belong to the AMAZING Erika of Cafe Fashionista and her generous giveaway that I won! I can't believe I now own such an incredibly high-class flat iron . . . I will try to remember to post a pic of my stick straight locks when I use it tomorrow. Thank you SO much, Erika!

My favorite girl on the cover of one of my favorite magazines. SO excited to fill up my bubble bath in a few minutes, settle in the warm water, and read about SJP. I'll even forgive her for wearing a boring dress on the cover. Have I mentioned that I have a life-sized poster of her in my hallway? Maybe I shouldn't have admitted that. I think it qualifies as idolatry. :)

The peppermint ice cream I'm allowing myself to indulge in since my throat is raspy and sore from coughing. Not only is it yummy, but isn't it pretty?

Funny student update:
For the past month or so, my students have been working on personal narratives about their experiences being arrested and incarcerated, and/or having incarcerated parents. All but one have written incredibly brave, compelling accounts, and have become sharp critics of prison and society. Some have written about witnessing their parent's arrest, some have written about visiting a parent in prison as a young child, and others have written about their own arrests and time spent in juvenile hall. I couldn't be prouder!

However . . . my most incorrigible student, ZT, has not exactly complied. He's been too busy chanting and ridiculing and cursing us out and getting kicked out of class to write his narrative. This past Friday, literally at least three weeks in, he decided to start working on his story. He did not, however, choose to do the assignment. Instead, he opted to write a one paragraph "report" on . . . Malcolm X. While this might be perfectly appropriate for a history class, it had absolutely nothing to do with my assignment. Here it is, for your entertainment:

The truth of a black man

Malcolm x death has been a tragedy to me because he was my hero in his younger days. he later changed his life around and sence he changed his life around I want to be just like he was when he was in the nation of islam. I want to be just like Malcolm because he reminds me when he was younger. i studied the hol quran every day. The best black muslim was the honerble Elijah muhhamad. He tought Malcom x every thang it is to be a muslim. Him going to jail for pimping a pandering has effect me because i wanted to be a pimp but now looking at it is not worth it going to jail for saling somebody body for cheap sex. That's why I chose Malcolm x as my hero. That's why I chose him. he is the best hero ever and he change his life around from being a pimp a burgerler and started studing the nation of islam. I would want to be a muslim one day. They believe that you cant go with white people or eat pork.

Ummmmm, awesome ZT. Not quite sure what to do with this one. Except to put it through grammar boot camp. Oh, and other relevant information: ZT typed this "paper" on a computer in the classroom on Friday. Today, another teacher informed me that mere minutes after ZT finished on the computer, there were suddenly various PORN POP UPS on the screen. Again . . . awesome.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Day Drinking

(Recap of weekend which followed hellish, stressfest week):

Friday: Left school, went straight to the patio at El Rio for my amazing co-worker's AIDS Ride fundraiser happy hour. Had two (strong) vodka sodas, then went to the Small Desk Press reading at Adobe Books in the Mission. Great reading, folks. I always love hearing Marisa read her poems, and Matt was great, and Corry, and Michael, and Lizzy, and everyone. Long freakin' day.

Saturday: So what if you're 8 hours late to the party? That's what I was to my friends' Kentucky Derby party in San Francisco on Saturday . . . but I showed up and quickly joined the ranks of those holding old fashioned cocktails in their right hands. But before I could become properly intoxicated, I started to feel a little sick (sore throat, etc.), so I fell asleep on the futon.

Sunday: After getting a text from my Rug-Boy at 5 am (what??), I couldn't sleep, so drove back home, canceled my babysitting job, took an Ambien, and SLEPT. Upon waking, I chatted with my roommate on our back deck, and determined that my sore throat + the miraculous sunshine only meant one thing: day drinking in the sun! I put on a tank top and a short skirt, drove to BevMo, and bought the ingredients for my new favorite cocktail (which I also imbibed at Doro and Anahita's Kentucky Derby party last night). Here's how today is going so far:

*delicious* banana nut muffins I baked this morning


sweet tea vodka + lemonade = instant happiness

new summer sandals

Sometimes decadence is the way to go. Also, two other exciting/alarming pieces of news:

1. One of my bffs in the whole wide world, Amy Lazzaroni, is in labor! I just got a text from her husband saying that she is 10 cm dilated and Baby Boy Lazzaroni is on his way! I love these people, so I can't wait to meet their little squishball.

2. I just got the news that one of my other bffs, Lane, is dating someone who drives a Hummer. Now we all know that this is all kinds of unacceptable. Help me convince her that this is most definitely a deal-breaker!!

Happy sunshiney Sunday! (cough, cough)